13♥00♥00♥17♥14

Mayan Date: 13♥00♥00♥17♥14

Tuesday: α, β, θ, δ

So yesterday was a Tayday and that is a pretty big deal.

Today I wake up fifteen hours after going to bed last night; 10:30.  My Mother has been chain calling me freqking out about some debt charges.  However she calmed down when I said it is for Kindle books…

Mother gave some lame excuse for making it exciting;  So I suspect it hs to do with Christmas presents.

Of course I am very grateful if my parents got me anything.  They do a lot for me already.

Yet today is quickly heading into α category.  The negative fog is dampening all feelings, and the standard tricks to fight it are less effective: like forcing myself to smile, think about someone I am blissfully in love with {Taylor Alison Swift}, et cetera

Therefore I am going back to bed.  As normal, i pray the Goddess and Her angels severe/separate/take me from this life unless my Ideal Wife {whomever} and I elope now/today and begin our Ideal Marriage/Family.

I am so very tired of living a life that is other than what I want.  I know I am the one who got me here.  At one time I DID want this life but that time hss long since passed.

So yes a new beginning would be beautiful.

Google's messed with blogger and is lreventing me from editing posts.  Hopefully, I just need to update the program on my iPhone.

… 01:21 …

I woke up about 13:00, so I guess this fits.  I felt better at first but right now it is drudging the α barrell.  The only benefit is that I feel never-never-land waiting behind my eyes.

Maybe Peter Pan and I will get something sexy going with Tinkerbell.  Thst way I can forget about coming back to this Prime Material ever.  It's evidently through with me, and I am definitely through with being in constant pain.

Maybe will see if my reinstall of Blogger's iPhone App allows me to edit posts again.

13♥00♥00♥17♥11

Mayan Date: 13♥00♥00♥17♥11

Saturday: α, β, θ, δ,

Today is a θ day.  However I stayed home half the day and even did not take a shower.

With my Mother, I went to the LifeQuest building to get weighed by our Ideal Protein dietary coach.  Afterwards we went to get groceries at Yokes.  My FS paid for almost all of the groceries, that was surprisingly awesome and sucky at the same time.

Sucky because that just means the FRB is mondtizing our debt even more than they did before.  That is sucky for our countries future.  I pray that the FRB is repealed disowned by the fed gov soon.

I spent a couple hours writing more on my first novel.

I tried explaining to my mother how I am praying for the Goddess and Her angels to guide me with my desire to refuse to participate in ObamaFailCare.  Part of the reason I am praying for guidance is that I wish to avoid arguing with my parents over it.

So my mother took this revelation as a sign to argue with me about it.

Both of my parents seem to have a disconnect with understanding what providence means and how it relates to us living our life.

That is weird for especially my Mother who was raised an orthadox Roman Catholic schoolgirl, and still is very religious though more Coptic now, later in her life.

I explained it to my mother but I think she just nodded her head to shut me up.

Some people fail and take the idea that the Goddess provides all that we want, as a sign to do nothing and be nothing, and everthing will be copasetic.  That is wrong.

What it means is to envision the future we want and let the Goddess handle the details of how that happens.  An omnipotent and omnipresent entity is better at it.

The higher-self still calls for us to manifest our will and actions in the present.  In the now, still let morals and ethics guide actions in response to day to day events.

Using Providence as an excuse to expect the Goddess to live our life for us is wrong… and only leads to failure.  Instead it is there to comfort us and give us hope when the night is darkest.

I downloaded the "Kindle for iPhone" app and am discovering the wonderful world of reading for a lot less than I was.  I bought a couple books for kindle on amazon.com and it sent it to my iPhone… that is hella awesome.

Thank you for sharing you Force. Be well…